Years ago, Rev. C. Galea was assigned to the Guelph Correctional Center for his summer work. While there, he developed an excellent rapport with many of the young people who were incarcerated.

He asked the boys for clues as to why they had ended up in that institution. He then asked them to draw up a code for parents, zeroing in on specific areas where they had failed. Here is what the boys shared:

1. Keep cool. Don't fly off the handle. Keep the lid on when things go wrong. Kids need to see how much better things turn out when people keep their tempers under control.
   
2. Don't get strung out on alcohol or other drugs. When we see our parents reaching for those crutches, we get the idea that nobody goes out there alone and that it's perfectly okay to reach for a bottle or capsule when things get rough. Remember, children are great imitators. We lose respect for parents who tell us to behave one way, while they behave just the opposite.
   
3. Bug us a little. Be strict. Show us who's boss. We need to know we've got some strong supports under us. When you cave in, we get scared.
   
4. Don't blow your class. Stay on that pedestal. Don't try to dress, dance, or talk like your kids. You embarrass us, and just end up looking ridiculous.
   
5. Light a candle. Show us the way. Tell us God is not dead, or sleeping, or on vacation. We need to believe in something bigger and stronger than ourselves.
   
6. GET TOUGH! If you catch us lying, stealing or being cruel, don't be afraid-be tough. Let us know why what we did was wrong. Impress on us the importance of not repeating such behavior.
   
7. When we need punishment, dish it out. But let us know you still love us, even though we have let you down. It will make us think twice before we make that same move again.
   
8. Call our bluff. Make it clear you mean what you say. Don't compromise. And don't be intimidated by our threats to drop out of school or leave home. Stand up to us, and we'll respect you. Kids don't actually want everything they ask for.
   
9. Be honest. Tell us the truth no matter what. And be straight-arrow about everything. We can take it! Lukewarm answers make us uneasy. We can smell uncertainty a mile away.
   
10. Praise us when we deserve it. If you give us kids a few compliments once in awhile, we will be able to accept criticism a lot more easily. The bottom line is-we want you to tell it like it is.